Tuesday, September 28, 2010

when bored at a walmart

  1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
  2. Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
  3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
  4. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
  5. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
  6. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
  7. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels
  8. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say, "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
  9. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again." .....and last but not least,
  10. Go into a fitting room and yell loudly, "Hey! We're out of toilet paper in here!"

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